“Some endings are sacred, because they make space for finally beginning.”
Robin said these words to me.
Is this true? I ask.
Will the selling of “the dream” possibly mean I am finally free?
Free to explore who I really am
Free to seek my soul
Free to be the person I am meant to be
Free to regain control
My destiny is no longer aligned
With what yours used to be
My destiny is no longer in line
With what “we” used to see
Lines were drawn in the sand
Of castles, of pen, of the paper in hand
Shouting, words, cannot be unsaid
That nagging voice persisting
…in my head:
“He will never forget, he will never move on”
“You’ve given him chance after chance”
“You will learn to dance your own dance…
…You will learn to sing your own song”
See? I don’t hate you
Just what you used to represent
The life I gave for us
I feel all the regret
I believed you would get over “it”
That we could move on
Together we would conduct
a life symphony, a psalm
A prayer to worship
The love we had for one another
Turns out you can’t fix a man
Who is envious of his own brother
Who envies what he couldn’t have
Who shames those he sees unpure
Who holds the shame in very deep
A hurt that will never be cured
You see no amount of “couples therapy”
Will allow you to see the truth
You can’t shame the one you claim to love
Into creating loves’ proof
Love is to be felt,
To be given,
To be an act
Love is not meant to be taken,
To be warped,
This is fact
Love is not shaming the one you love
Into some sort of confession you seek
Love is not push, pull, shove
Not making those who are brave to be meek
Love is not shame
Or blame
Or shouting
Or heartache
Love is not blind
It is not a crime
It is never take and take
On the continuum
Of shifting sands of lore
Love isn’t screaming
Or slamming of doors
Or threats or cajoling
Or claims of suicide
Or death by trolling
Or waving of weapons
Or shouting of insults
Or spewing out hatred
Love isn’t any of those things
In fact love is negated
When one wields it as a weapon
Instead of a cure